Hey Obama, Rev. Wright’s holding on the bat-phone…

Barack Obama: Hello? Reverend Wright?

Rev. Wright: Let me just say this to you my good man, my good friend, my good member of the flock — you make me proud today!

BO: Um, well, thanks Reverend. I don’t–

RW: Yes you do. Yes you do! ‘Typical white person.’ Barack WELCOME HOME! Welcome home. At last, welcome home.

BO: No, well, you see, Reverend, I was just trying to point out that some people–

RW: My eyes tear up today. My lips quiver with the hope that–

BO: Hang on, Reverend. That ‘Typical white person’ thing sort of just slipped out the wrong way. We gotta keep this one down. I don’t need another shovel, Reverend.

RW: Shovel? Shovel? My son you ain’t in no hole. You are rising up that hill. Hey, that ’shining city on a hill’, you can use that. It worked for the actor.

BO: No, thank you Reverend, but this isn’t, I mean, Bill Richardson’s decorating the mahogany today and, and–

RW: I’m booked on Oprah tomorrow and I am gonna make you proud by–

BO: No! Cease! Reverend, no! Oprah? Don’t. I need a typical cigarette. I’m irrevocably tied to our tragic past. Gotta go, Reverend. Senator Kerry’s on line two. He just nominated me to ‘bridge the divide of religious extremism’!